“My Co-Worker is a Pimp” and Other Strange-But-True Workplace Complaints

Remember that time you thought your co-worker was a pimp? Me, neither.  But anyway…

In efforts to “bring a little levity to the workplace,” CareerBuilder recently surveyed 2,600 hiring managers nationwide about the oddest complaints they’ve ever received from employees.  Today, it released the results of that survey, and below is the cream of the creepy crop: 

1. Employee is too sun-tanned.
2. Employee has big hair.
3. Employee eats all the good cookies.
4. Employee is so polite, it’s infuriating.
5. Employee suspected co-worker is a pimp.
6. Employee is trying to poison me.
7. Employee’s body is magnetic and keeps de-activating my magnetic access card.
8. Employee is personally responsible for a federally-mandated tax increase.
9. Employee was annoyed the company didn’t provide a place for naps during break time.
10. Employee only wears slippers or socks at work.
11. Employee’s aura is wrong.
12. Employee smells like road ramps.
13. Employee breathes too loudly.
14. Employee wants to check a co-worker for ticks.
15. 8:00 a.m. is too early to get up for work.
16. Employee wore pajamas to work.
17. Employee has bells on her shoes and it’s not the holidays.
18. Co-worker reminded the employee too much of Bambi.
19. Employee spends too much time caring for stray cats around the building.
20. A male employee keeps using the ladies’ room because the men’s room is not as tidy.

First, looking at this list, I have to say that not all of these complaints are completely unfounded. I mean, I’d be pretty peeved too if my co-worker got to wear pajamas to work (no matter how fancy they might be). And – while I don’t know that I’d go to HR about it – c’mon…eating all the good cookies? That’s not cool.

As for the employee who complained that the company doesn’t provide a place for naps during break time? That person might actually be on to something, according to a recent Harvard Business article that says that naps are effective workplace productivity boosters.

Second, I think the question we really need to ask here is: How did these hiring managers respond to these complaints?

Because, honestly, what do you say when someone complains that a co-worker’s aura is wrong? (Do you have to then prove this? Is it grounds for dismissal? Is anyone’s aura ever really right? So many questions!) …or that someone smells like road maps? (Road maps? Really?) …or that a co-worker reminds them of Bambi? (What’s wrong with Bambi?!)

Would love to hear your input here…What’s the strangest complaint you’ve ever heard (and how did you handle it)?

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• Posted by: Mary Lorenz on August 12, 2009
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• Categories: Survey Results